SSSSS: Stupid Scary Slow Sonic Stories
by Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus
Summary: TrollingnoobXDew, Candlelight Fantasia, and I team up to deliver a trio of Halloween horrors featuring the wide variety of the Sonic cast! Are you too slow to outrun the frights that you'll get from these tales? Profile pic done by TrollingnoobXDew.
1. The Shiny

**SSSSS: Stupid Scary Slow Sonic Stories**

**Co Written By **TrollingnoobXDew**, Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus, and Candlelight Fantasia  
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**The Shiny**

**Written By TrollingnoobXDew  
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"Bark check it out, now!" Bean screamed, running into the dumpy house and slamming the door behind him, before dashing up to the polar bear and smashing the television remote from his hand. Bark glared angrily towards the duck, slouching on the couch as the television continued to play its never ending parade of commercials. "Look at it, isn't it a beaut?" Bean asked with a smile, holding up what appeared to be a very shiny silver bomb. The polar bear looked wide-eyed, pushing the bomb away from his face ever so carefully. "Calm down bud, it isn't real, well according to Fiona it isn't," Bean informed plopping down on the couch next to his friend, turning the "bomb" in his hands to admire it.

"Yep I was out and about playing in the leaves, when Foxy strolls by saying she found the greatest present in the world, and guess what she's right, I mean who wouldn't want a shiny replica of a bomb? Anyway she said she was taking a walk through the Great Forest when she bumped into this old pudgy man who appeared to be a drifter, he said he had some things she might be interested in, and this was one of them. As soon as she saw it she knew I would love it, so she got it for me, and the best part is she didn't even have to pay for it, it was free. Jeez Bark you should be like Fiona more often, getting me amazing presents and stuff, and guess what she promised to take me trick or treating on Halloween," Bean ranted and explained simultaneously, all while staring at his new present.

Bark took in all the news and his face only seemed to grow more disbelieved as it went on, everyone knows creepy old people who give out free things lead to trouble, well most of the time. "Hmm… I gotta give you a name, how about Shiny?" Bean asked the silver "bomb", still fumbling with it and giving it a long lasting inspection. "Yeah I like it too, well Shiny, how about I go show you my room?" Bean more or so informed before leaping off the couch, sprinting down a nearby hall, diving into a room, and slamming the door shut. Bark watched his friend disappear behind the door, unknowing it would be awhile to he saw him again.

"Bean how many times did I tell you not to slam doors in my house?" Fang shouted from the room two doors down from Bean's. Moments later the weasel found himself walking down the hallway and knocking at the duck's door, when Fang realized he wasn't going to be getting an answer, he let out a sigh and decided to join Bark on the couch. "So Fiona got him something else to annoy me with, jeez that stupid girl needs to stop giving him things, I think her goal in life is to make my life miserable," Fang told the listening but never speaking bear beside him, who was picking the remote off the floor. "Oh well as long as it keeps him busy and out of my sight, too bad Halloween's approaching, he'll be bothering me all day," Fang said, lying back with a yawn before kicking his feet up on the coffee table in front of him.

That day was October twenty-seventh and the weasel was right, All Hallows' Eve was creeping its way towards the citizens of Mobius, and more importantly towards the people of the Acorn Kingdom. Each year on the thirty-first the Kingdom of Acorn holds a celebration in the center of Knothole with forgettable… I mean important figures such as King Acorn and Sally, but don't expect Sonic to show, he's too busy forgetting about the celebration in the first place. Anyway this party of the year was almost a taunt towards people like Fang, of course they weren't invited, not that they really wanted to go, but still it felt like a bragging reminder that they were the forgettable wanted scum of the earth, and to be honest it was the truth. In the end the group of criminals usually found themselves staying at home, but this year things were about to change.

And just by jumping down to the next paragraph it was the night of the thirty-first, in Knothole the townspeople were hastily putting up some final decorations for the event. Streamers and orange colored lights hung from the already fall touched trees, which were casually dropping leaves onto the cold ground that was already littered with them. Tables and chairs decorated with Halloween designs were everywhere, piled high with pumpkin pie and other seasonal treats. Along with crowds of chattering costumed citizens, the streets were aligned with jack-o- lanterns, artificial candles, skeletons, spider webs, and a wide variety of other decorations that some poor sap would be cleaning up the next day. In the center of the town lied a huge bonfire which was shooting up flames into the full moon night, behind it was a large banner that read, "Happy Halloween Knothole!" And to the left and right of the fire were two temporary stages, the one on the left sat the throne of King Acorn and Princess Sally, surrounded by royal guards, and the one to the right held Mina and the Forget Me Knots, who were jamming away for the cheering crowd.

In the meantime Bark and Fang were chillaxing in their small rundown house as they usually did, if I hadn't told you a few days passed you wouldn't have noticed, Bark was slouched on the couch flickering through horror movies on the television, and Fang was sitting next to him while drinking a beer and munching on chips.

"I can't believe it's Halloween and Bean hasn't cracked a word, he's usually lingering around me all day," Fang broke the silence as he took a swig of his drink, before laying it on the dusty coffee table. "Thinking about it, Bean hasn't made a peep since he got that stupid bomb thing, I haven't even seen him come out of his room," Fang said with a bit of concern, Bark turning and letting out a grunt in response. "Well as long as I'm happy it doesn't matter, he can stay in his room and never leave… wait if he's not leaving his room, what is he eating, and more importantly where is he using the bathroom?" Fang questioned his face becoming shocked in disgust as Bark evenly shared the same expression. The two leapt up from the aging couch and found themselves speeding over towards Bean's bedroom door. "Bean unlock this door right now, you can't spend your life hiding in your room, and you certainly can't be taking shits in there," Fang ordered, banging on the door repeatedly as he fumbled with the doorknob. After receiving no response, Bark's concern grew, it wasn't like his best friend to hide in his room and not make a peep for so long.

Letting out an angry huff, Bark pushed Fang aside and with a swift movement he knocked the door in, resulting in the two men being greeted by a waft of horrible stale smelling air. "Jeez what is that smell, Bean what the hell have you been doing in here?" Fang coughed in question, clenching his nose a Bark swiped his arms to clear the smell. The room was a mess, furniture was overturned and broken, various items were thrown on the floor, and the walls were covered in the word: Shiny, written over and over in different sizes. Bean himself was sitting on his unmade bed, his back towards the two as he fumbled with something in his hands. "Oh my God… since when does he know how to write?" Fang questioned, inspecting the various writings on the wall, missing the point that there was something very wrong with Bean. Bark sent a frown towards the weasel as he approached his best friend, placing a hand on his shoulder. The duck's head slowly turned around in a one eighty to face the polar bear, his eyes glowed a mix of red and blue, and his mouth was in a disgusted frown before it flew open to let out an inhuman screech that sent Bark stumbling back. "What the… Bean what has gotten into you? This is ridiculous, I know you love that stupid shiny thing so much, but locking yourself in your room and trashing it makes no logical sense, either way this has to stop, now," Fang instructed as Bean's body turned to join his head.

"Shiny, I love Shiny, he's my Shiny," Bean whispered to himself, a crazed look upon his face, "Shiny doesn't like you, Shiny wants you out!"

"Bean I didn't want to have to do this, but you're going to hand over that stupid thing right now, and then you're going to clean your damn room," Fang commanded, stomping forward and grabbing for the metal looking bomb.

"No!" Bean shouted before biting Fangs arm and leaping on top of him, punching him repeatedly with one hand, as the other held the "bomb" close to his chest, "Kill, kill for Shiny!"

"Get off of me!" Fang screamed, kicking the crazed duck back and fumbling to get to his feet, "That's it, hand it over or I shoot!"

"You think you can just take Shiny from me, nobody can take my Shiny," Bean laughed, not realizing that Bark was stepping forward, and with one great swipe, the Shiny was gone from the duck's clutches. "No… no… you can't take Shiny, Shiny's mine!" Bean let out a furious growl as he clenched his fist and dove at the awaiting polar bear, who dodged the attack with a swift move to the left.

"I warned you… where is it?" Fang shouted; ready to put a bullet in the insane Bean, but finding his holster empty, "Bark run!" Bark grunted in reply following the dashing weasel out the door and slamming it behind him. The two sped down to the end of the hall as the sound of increasingly loud banging rang out from behind them, and just as the two dove into Fang's room, Bean came bursting out of his.

"Oh Barky boy, I'm right behind you!" Bean screamed wildly, as he slowly trudged down the hall, his eyes glowing brighter than ever.

"It's got to be in here somewhere!" Fang cried, his face a twisted mess of worriment as Bark shut the door and barricaded it with a nearby chair from Fang's desk. Fang continued to rummage through his neat room turning it into a mess, as items were tossed here and there. Bark started to make impatient noises as the sound of approaching footsteps neared the door, and Bean's taunting voice came close behind it.

"Little pigs, little pigs, let me come in," Bean smiled as he casually knocked on the door.

"Fuck you!" Fang screamed, tearing his desk apart, still on the quest for the lost revolver.

"Then I'll huff and I'll puff and I'll crack your heads in," Bean laughed, pulling an axe seemingly out of nowhere and smashing it against the door.

"I found it!" Fang cheered, picking up the revolver from his desk and quickly checking its ammunition as Bark looked fearfully at the excited weasel. The sound of cracking wood continued to grow louder as Fang ran forward and aimed towards the door, ready to unleash hell, but before he could give the trigger a click, Bark knocked his hand down and shoved the silver bomb into his space. "Bark I know you don't want me to shoot Bean, but he's not your friend anymore, he's a psychopath… well one that's actually trying to murder people now," Fang told the annoyed polar bear who shook his head in a "No!", and pointed towards the "bomb" that he was still holding right in front of the weasel. "Oh you want me to destroy the stupid silver thing instead of Bean. I don't know how that's going to help except make that idiot more angry, but doing stupid things has saved me countless times before, so hand it over," Fang sighed grabbing the Shiny from Bark's grip and tossing it to the ground a few feet in front of him. "Here goes nothing," Fang commented as he aimed and gave the trigger a pull.

"Here's Bean!" the crazed duck shouted, smashing a hole in the barricaded door with the axe, and poking his head through, just to complete the reference towards "The Shining", as if the title of this story wasn't enough. At the exact same moment the bullet pierced the metallic looking bomb and seemed to stay stuck in the surface of the thing, but just as Bean pushed the chair out of the way and reached for the doorknob, the Shiny began to rumble like crazy, as cracks appeared all along its surface. Finally it seemed to fall into pieces, collapsing apart, and becoming a pile of dust on the floor.

"Is it over?" Fang asked, looking towards Bark who shrugged in return.

"Hey guys what's new?" Bean greeted as he opened the door and walked in casually, dropping the axe to the floor behind him.

"Stop!" Fang shouted, pointing his gun at the approaching duck.

"Whoa there Nacky, calm down, it's me Bean," Bean said with his typical stupid grin on his face. Fang and Bark looked over the duck for a second, seeing that the crazed look and weird glowing eyes had vanished, and the Bean they all knew and loved… I mean put up with, was back.

"Well that was enough excitement for one night, and now that everything's okay, Bean can clean up the whole house," Fang said, placing his revolver in his holster with a smile of success.

"Aw… hey maybe they can help me," Bean whined at first before smiling and pointing to something behind the happy Fang and Bark.

"What are you…," Fang started as he and Bark turned to see floating apparitions of a blue and a red duck wearing vice versa bowties.

"Well hello there, my name's Bin and my friend here is Pin, but of course Bean here already knows that," the blue duck greeted as the red duck waved towards the two shocked looking men.

"Ghost… you're ghost, but how… what… Bean!" Fang screamed, his blood pressure rising once more.

"Don't waste your energy on that fool, he's more trouble than he's worth," Pin informed with a yawn.

"Okay someone better tell me what exactly is going on around here," Fang ordered angrily as Bark let out a growl towards the ghostly visitors.

"Funny, that's exactly what we had in mind. Well you see a long time ago Pin and I were abandoned by our families, though luckily for us a young human girl named Lucy took us in. She raised and nurtured us as if we were one of her own, and to us, she was the mother we never had. During our time as children we were warned about a troublemaker named Bean, but we stupidly ignored these warnings and somehow befriended the idiotic troll, probably due to us all being interested in explosives, we even made a group name, The Dynamite Dux. One day when we were older an evil sorcerer named Achacha came along, like must evil magic people, Achacha had a plan to conquer the world, and become King. Of course this meant he needed a Queen, and that Queen was Lucy," Bin began explaining before Pin decided to take over.

"Bin and I were forced to destroy all of Achacha's forces and him by ourselves. Bean refused to come along, saying that he had no reason to help, since he had no connection to Lucy. Even though we defeated Achacha, we didn't know that he had cursed Lucy, since he couldn't have her, no one could, she died only a few days after the rescue. Typically we wanted revenge to destroy Achacha once and for all, and this time Bean agreed to come along, but when we were just about ready to fight Achacha, he was nowhere to be found. Achacha defeated us, and using his magic he sealed our souls into one of our very own bombs, which turned silver in response. He then stored us on his shelf as a trophy for years, until for some reason he handed us over to a pretty fox who decided to give us to Bean, just the duck we were looking for. Even though we didn't have much power in the bomb, we were able to slowly possess Bean, hoping to eventually drive him so insane that he may kill himself. But you guys had to interfere, for the better that is. As you can see, we're now free and can have our revenge much more conveniently," Pin finished the explanation with a grin.

"Wow, what a waste of two paragraphs," Bean commented, a bored look upon his face.

"Oh so you're here to get revenge on Bean for leaving you all those years ago, which means Bark and I can leave right?" Fang questioned with a false smile as sweat dripped from his forehead.

"Well for the first part of the question you're correct, for the second part you're wrong, as we're going to be possessing your bodies in a few seconds," Bin answered before flying straight into Bark.

"Oh shit!" Fang screamed, going to run as Pin flew into him, making him stop automatically in place.

"Hey guys did you notice my name backwards spells Naeb," Bean said, turning his attention towards his two friends, "Hey where did Bin and Pin the ghost go, oh well they were lame anyway."

"We're right here," Bark said in Bin's voice, his eyes glowing a bright blue.

"I know Bark, I meant… wait a second Bark doesn't talk, nor does he sound like Bin, that must mean you're being dubbed," Bean stated in triumph.

"No you idiot, we're Bin and Pin, we just possessed your friends," Pin informed through Fang's body, the eyes glowing a fiery red.

"Well then, you want to kill me right?" Bean asked in a frown, the two spirits using the bodies to nod their heads "Yes" in response, "Okay you stay here why I run away… no wait let's settle this like gentlemen, I'll go first. I left you guys to fight Achacha by yourself all those years ago, because I was bored."

"Is that the truth?" Bin questioned back not impressed.

"Yep," Bean truthfully trolled.

"Well, now we're really going to fucking murder you, and then keep your friends' bodies forever," Pin said, both of the spirits' expressions not changing, but before they could kill Bean, the doorbell rang.

"I forgot Fiona's here to pick me up to go trick or treating, excuse me for a second would ya?" Bean smiled before rushing out of the room and to the front door, leaving Bin and Pin to trade awkward expressions. "Sup Fiona, how's it going?" Bean greeted, stepping outside and pulling the front door shut behind him.

"Hey sweetie, sorry I'm running late, I just came from a party down at the casinos," Fiona smiled, standing in front of the duck in her rarely worn long black coat.

"Oh no worries, as long as we get candy and we get to teepee a few houses, it's all good. I know how busy life can be sometimes, I mean just a second ago I was dealing with some dead friends who were trapped inside that Shiny you gave me, and now they're possessing Bark and Fang's bodies, and are trying to kill me," Bean said nonchalantly with a slight wave of his hand.

"Wait what… Bean are you on something?" Fiona asked uneasily, her face in a frown.

"No, but are you, because if you are, can I have some?" Bean questioned back with large trollish grin, but before the vixen could respond, the front door came smashing down on Bean, and two very angry looking men stood in the door way.

"What the hell, Bark and Fang what do you think you're doing?" Fiona asked in utter shock.

"Yeah, what do you think you're doing?" Bean joined in, slipping out from underneath the door and giving a pouty face towards the spirits.

"Well hello there Foxy, I have to thank you for picking us up earlier, anyway we'll just be a second with Bean here, and then we'll take good care of you," Bin smiled creepily, stepping towards Bean.

"Bean, when you told me about vengeful ghosts a few seconds ago, I thought you were full of shit. Now that Bark's talking straight to my face, I totally believe you," Fiona frowned, to the smiling duck.

"I know right, anyway we should get out of here before they kill me and do unspeakable things to you, but those unspeakable things will never happen since this story's rated T," Bean explained before leaping up, grabbing the fox by the arm, and shooting towards an unknown destination.

"So I see you guys want to do this the hard way, well let's do it to it," Pin smiled towards his friend, giving him a fist bump as the two started after their prey.

"Bean we need to find the guy who gave me the silver bomb," Fiona instructed, running alongside her friend, who was looking at the night sky as the two kicked up waves of leaves behind them.

"Whatever, as long as we get candy," Bean responded, giving an unconcerned look towards Fiona.

"Sometimes…" Fiona shook her head in annoyance as she slipped of her coat and threw it behind her, letting her move with much more ease, if you call running in black skintight pants and a matching belly top being able to move with much more ease.

"Hey I know where to look, it's where everyone goes on Halloween," Bean said speeding ahead.

"Bean, no not Knothole, you idiot!" Fiona shouted angrily as she swiftly followed behind. In the meantime the Halloween celebration in Knothole was well underway, except Sonic the Hedgehog was still nowhere to be seen.

"And that was Mina Mongoose and the Forget Me Knots' newest hit, Spooky Scary Skeletons. Let's give it up for the Knots!" Princess Sally cheered over the microphone, which was followed by a loud applause from the crowd as Mina waved and blew kissing, stepping down from the stage along with the rest of her band. "In other news Sonic is still not here, but I encourage you to stick around as there is a slight chance he'll show up," Sally tried to smile, cringing as the audience started booing and grumbling in dissappointment. "NICOLE where's Sonic?" Sally whispered to her little computer, turning her back towards the mike.

"How should I know, Sally," the Holo-Lynx replied, shaking her head in disbelief.

"Useless as usual I see," Sally groaned, slamming the computer shut before shoving it back in her vest. Suddenly the sound of the crowd turned from anger to confusion as somebody came quickly pushing towards the bonfire. "Well look who showed up this year… you're not Sonic!" Sally shouted over the microphone as Bean stepped out of the mass of people towards the large fire, with Fiona trailing right behind.

"Hey there your majesty, we've come here looking for some pudgy old man, do you know him?" Bean questioned, wobbling his way stupidly towards the stage.

"What… Bean and Fiona, I thought we made it pretty clear that you're not welcome here, and if you don't leave this instant, Antoine here will arrest the two of you," Sally threatened, the duck looking directly up at her from the grass below.

"I'll take that as a maybe," Bean responded, his expression still caught in its everlasting smile.

"I know we're not anywhere near close to friends, but what Bean here is saying is absolutely true, we need to find this man now or we could be in danger, don't you have a heart?" Fiona asked, giving a look of innocence.

"I don't give a shit what you're doing here, you leave now, or else," Sally informed in frustration.

"Don't worry friends, I'm here, and I've been waiting for you Bean," a voice suddenly crept up from behind the duck and fox who both turned to the large fire. Suddenly the surrounding crowd grew quite as they all watched a fat little old man step out of the flames untouched.

"That's him," Fiona said softly to Bean who gave a thumbs up in return.

"Good evening citizens of Knothole, Princess Sally, King Acorn, Miss Fox, and of course you Bean," the man smiled creepily his tone dark and unforgiving, "I hope you're enjoying your Halloween, cause it's about to come to an end."

"So you think you could get away did… Achacha?" Bin started as the two spirits shoved their way out of the crowd and joined their targets at the roaring fire.

"Wait Achacha, you're Achacha… duh, why wasn't I paying attention earlier," Bean face palmed himself.

"Wait is there something I should know?" Fiona questioned, Bean handed her a laptop in reply and pointed to the explanation section earlier in this story, "Oh."

"I have no idea what's going on here, but all of you can get the hell out of my Kingdom, now!" Sally screamed.

"Sorry Princess, but I have business to attend to," Achacha gave a cold smile.

"Antoine, get him!" Sally shouted, stomping her foot repeatedly.

"Of course my Princess," Antoine saluted, marching forward and grabbing the sorcerer by the arm, "You're under arrest."

"Get off me fool," Achacha commanded, punching the coyote in the face and sending him flying back.

"It's ze curse!" Antoine cried, pulling himself from the ground and running off.

"Get back here, you pussy!" Sally yelled.

"Now if you excuse me, as you know Bean, a long time ago I sealed your friends into their own bomb and kept it as a trophy. Over the years as my knowledge for the dark arts grew, I discovered I could create a new world by breaking the barrier between the living and the dead, one that I could control. Sadly the only way to do this is to have the spirit of a dead one that has a connection to a spirit of the living, combine together to break the realm. Knowing that I had Bin and Pin as two dead spirits and knowing that you a living spirit were once friends with them, I decided to watch you for a couple weeks and then I put together this whole elaborate plan which so far is right on cue," the sorcerer explained to the non-listening duck before him.

"God damn it, I knew are luck was too good to be true!" Pin shouted angrily to his friend.

"Though our luck's about to change, cause we're going to kick your ass!" Bin yelled, ready to throw some massive punches.

"Hmm, too bad all I need to do is use my spell to suck all of your souls together into this bomb, your friend Bean just handed me," Achacha smirked as he started to chant unrecognizable words, waving his one arm in the air as he held the bomb in the other.

"Bean!" almost everyone seemed to scream.

"What?" Bean said shrugging his shoulders, not caring that the bomb he just gave to the sorcerer was the reason everybody was going to die. And just like that a large gust of wind started swirling its way around, blowing up leaves and dirt while citizens ducked for cover.

"You stupid no good… Bean I hate you!" Bin and Pin screamed simultaneously as their spirits were ripped from Bark and Fang's bodies, which fell to the ground in response.

"I love you too!" Bean smiled as his soul was also ripped from its body and dragged towards the bomb. Bin and Pin shouted helplessly as they disappeared into the explosive, and as Bean was nearing his fate he did a quick swing towards the fire, shoving his head in it and yelling, "I always wanted to do that!"

"Oh no you don't," Achacha grinned, swinging the bomb towards the spirit and sucking it in, "Yes, finally!"

"Bean!" Fiona cried amongst many fearful cries from the crowd.

"Any minute now the barrier will break and all of you will be my loyal slaves, nothing can stop me now!" the sorcerer laughed crazily, of course jinxing himself, and not seeing that his quick turn towards the fire to catch Bean's soul had lit the bomb.

"Everybody get down, except for Sally!" Fiona shouted, diving towards the ground next to the lying body of Fang.

"What the hell are you…" though before he could finish his sentence Achacha was caught in the fiery explosion. Having no time to shield himself with his magic, Achacha was blown to many crispy pieces which lay before the frighten citizens, who at this point were leaving the area as quickly as they could manage. Out of the explosion shot the souls of Bean, Bin, and Pin who looked very much confused at the moment, except for Bean who was grinning as he flew back into his body.

"Shazam, I'm alive," Bean cheered, jumping up and doing a stupid dance as Bark and Fang made their way up, brushing themselves off, and trying to get their minds straight.

"Oh thank goodness hon, I was so worried," Fiona cried, giving Bean a tight hug, which the troll quickly pulled out of.

"Fiona stop cramping my style," Bean said before looking at the confused floating spirits of Bin and Pin, "What are you fools still doing here?"

"Bean you helped us complete our unfinished business, by destroying Achacha, you have granted our souls peace. Pin and I can finally make our way to the Heavens and join up with our loving Lucy in the afterlife, or in words you'll understand, we're not going to try to kill you anymore, and we're leaving," Bin explained before both him and Pin gave a wave and flew off into the night sky.

"I have no idea what the fuck just happened, but either way you're all under arrest!" Sally screamed at the top of her lungs to the group of criminals below.

"Um… this is the part where we run back to your house, and try to collect our sanity there," Fiona awkwardly smiled towards Bean before flicking off Sally, and scampering off as quickly as possible.

"Wait Bean, what is going on?" Fang tried to question, watching Bean dash to a nearby table lined with some unclaimed candy, which he shoved into his hands.

"No time Fang, I'll tell you later, but everything's okay, I got candy!" Bean cheered, running after Fiona.

"Wait what?" Fang said dumbfounded as Bark quickly picked him up and shot off in pursuit of the duck.

"Are you kidding me, where's the damn guards when you need them?" Sally stomped in fury, realizing that the village center was empty except for the litter of trash and decorations. "And of course Sonic doesn't show, fuck!" Sally screamed, kicking over the mike in front of her.

"Huh… Sally watch your mouth, and tell the citizens I said happy Halloween…" King Acorn instructed from behind Sally, awaking from a deep sleep that he then fell back into without much concern. Sally frowned in response just as the wind blew the ongoing bonfire back, catching the "Happy Halloween Knothole!" banner on fire. And so children that brings our Halloween tale to an end, and yes the moral of the story is don't put flammable things near fires, cause that's no good!


	2. MARINE

_Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do..._

_When there's something strange, in Sonic's World... who you gonna call?_

_Marine Busters!_

_When there's something fast, and you need to blast, you you gonna call?_

_Marine Busters!_

_Do do do do do do do do do do-_

"Ya!" Exclaimed Marine The Racoon as she was beating herself up, shocking the other three members of the team.

"Uh..." Silver The Hedgehog remarked as he folded his arms together.

"Take this, me!" Marine exclaimed as she punched herself in the stomach, causing her to fart a brassy poot in turn.

"Hmmm." E-123 Omega commented as he lowered his mechanical arms.

"Aiyei!" Marine exclaimed as she then gave herself a wedgie. "You're not so flippin' tough, mate, are ya?"

"...I like catnip." Big The Cat stated as he was picking his nose, with Froggy on his right shoulder.

"I think Marine is busting herself." Silver pointed out as he pointed at Marine.

"So I see." Omega commented as he placed his right arm on his metal hip.

"We better change our name to something else." Big stated as he aimed his fishing rod at the dark, night sky, with all four of them being in the middle of nowhere.

_Who you gonna call?_

_Ghost Busters!_

Silver slapped his forehead. "Are you kidding me? Do you want to get sued?"

"Okay, okay, maybe I wasn't thinking straight." Big admitted with a shrug.

"No, you obviously weren't." Silver grumbled as he narrowed his eyes at the big fat purple cat.

"Fight back, you blabbermouth slut!" Marine exclaimed to herself as she was slapping herself across the face several times.

Omega snapped his robotic fingers as he turned to the two male, organic mammals. "I know the perfect name."

_Who you gonna call?_

_Worthless Consumer Models Busters!_

"No, Omega. That ain't gonna fly." Silver replied as he shook his head in disapproval.

Omega scoffed as he folded his arms together. "Well I want to blast inferior robots."

"I just wanna go fish with Froggy." Big remarked as he began scratching his butt.

The three males then watched as Marine was rolling around on the ground, tearing her ears as far as they could go.

"Come now! I could do better!" Marine referred to herself as she was smashing herself in the head with a frying pan she pulled out of her ass, her face and body getting bloodier by the beating.

"I think Marine has the right idea for once..." Silver commented as he just shook his head, wrapping his arms around the back of his head.

* * *

><p>Marine gasped as she woke up, gasping as she was in her bed, glancing around to see that she was at home in her hut. "Phew... it was all a dream..." She then felt how damp her covers were, blushing. "...crickey, I hope this is sweat..."<p>

_**M**adness_

**M.A.R.I.N.E.**

**By Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus**

_**A**wkwardness_

Marine later was at Sonic Adventure's Station Square, approaching the famous Pizza Hut to see that there was no one inside. She was surprised by this, going up and down and all around the building to see that there was only one person there... and it was Rotor Walrus.

"Something's up, Marine?" Rotor asked as he was cleaning up the green counter.

Marine murmured as she shook her head, her hands on her hips. "Yeah... something seems odd. It's like no one is here, or something." She then suddenly grew an extra pair of arms that wrapped around the back of her head.

Rotor's eyes widened as Omega entered the Pizza Hut, noticing that Marine had an extra set of arms, turning his robotic arms into cannons.

"Must destroy freak." Omega stated as he blasted Marine several times, causing her to fall on the floor as Rotor dropped his jaw, literally, in disbelief.

* * *

><p><em><strong>R<strong>uined_

Marine then woke up, looking around to see that she was in the fiery Crisis City, gawking in disbelief as she placed her hands on her face.

"Blimey! How the hell did I get here?" She asked as she sniffed the air, glancing at her butt to see that she was on fire. "OAH! MY BLOOMIN' ARSE IS ON FIRE!"

"Of course it is, you fucking idiot." Mephiles The Dark replied, being in his crystallized form as he was the one to set Marine's rear on fire. "I did it because I just don't like you. Or your incredibly annoying accent."

"Oy! I'm not annoying!" Marine shouted as she was frantically patting her flaming butt, letting out a brassy fart as her entire body then was lit on fire. "YEOWCH! I RUINED MY ENTIRE BODY!"

"What a laugh riot." Mephiles evilly chuckled as Marine was then grabbed by the right hand of Iblis' final form, the fiery god munching down on her and bellowing loudly as he barfed red molten magma everywhere.

* * *

><p><em><strong>I<strong>ce_

Marine was trying her best to escape the couple of giant snowballs that were rolling after her, with her being at the Ice Cap Zone as she then slipped on some ice, spinning around and screaming as she went through a small cavern, being nailed by several icicles hanging on the ceiling.

"Holy shit! These blooming ice things are out to get me!" Marine exclaimed as she then fell into some open, cold water, popping out as a giant ice cube.

The Babylon Rogues flew past the scene on their Extreme Gear boards, turning their attention to see Marine trapped in the ice block.

"That girl just isn't having any luck, is she?" Wave The Swallow remarked as she wrapped her arms around the back of her head.

"Nope. She got screwed, big time!" Storm The Albatross pointed out as the three snowballs chasing Marine landed in the pool of cold water, causing Marine to submerge underneath the waves.

"Sucks to be her!" Jet The Hawk stated as he was munching on some Chicken Nuggets he got from a Wendy's they zipped by, continuing to zip onward towards the western direction, with Marine not being able to do anything in her current situation.

* * *

><p><em><strong>N<strong>eedles_

Marine glanced around to see that she was in a dark laboratory somewhere in one of the scrapped zones from the classic Sonic games, trying to move as she was strapped to a bed, both her arms and legs, as well as her tail from the back.

"Agh! Jiminy, why can't I move?" Marine grunted as she struggled, shaking her head. "It's like I'm being held back against my will!"

"Oh, but you are." Chuckled the nefarious Doctor Eggman Nega, who chuckled as he towered over Marine with several needles in his hands. "And it's time... you got your daily dose!"

Marine screamed at the sight of the needles, but what was worse was that Eggman Nega ripped off his usual black, yellow, and red clothes, revealing a cloak entirely colored in green and purple, making Marine scream even more as she was shocked, being paralyzed as Nega stuck all the needles into her body, sucking them up as he reduced her into a shrimp, with the mad scientist chuckling as he rubbed his hands together, having done his insane task.

"T-thanks, doc..." Marine coughed as she wasn't strong enough to say anything, hoping that this was just another odd nightmare.

* * *

><p><em><strong>E<strong>nergy_

Marine panted as she let out a sigh, falling back down on her feet as she was at dead last in a race she was having with Omega and Big. Rather, a race for her life as she was running from the zombies that were populating the Casino Park. The zombies were cloned versions of Marine and the various, underused Sonic characters, all cloned up by Eggman Nega, who gave them a deceased potion that removed all of their intelligence.

"Guys! Wait... I'm too... tired..." Marine groaned as she fell flat on her face, being taken by the zombies, munching down on her.

Omega and Big turned around, being at the highest point in Casino Park, of which was one of the neon lit towers as they looked down at the zombies trying to climb their way upward, but failing. Omega fired off his arm cannons at them, blasting the zombies away as Big tilted his head.

"Shouldn't we do something to get that Marine girl?" Big asked as he had Froggy in his arms.

Omega turned his head to Big as he kept firing at the zombies. "It is too late to rescue the annoying, Australian racoon. She should have had the energy to keep up." He replied as he turned his head back, having fun with his zombie shooting.

Big simply stared blankly at Froggy, who stared blankly into the dark, night sky, as Marine continued to attempt screaming for help, being too weak to fight back.

**_Happy Halloween!_**


	3. Crispy Critters

**Hello folks and Happy Halloween! Candlelight Fantasia here to do an awesome anthology with two other great writers on FF kingdom. I'm privileged that they find my story's amusing enough and feel really proud to partake in this idea. As a trick and a treat I give you my story!**

**Crispy Critters**

**Chaotix Headquarters:**

"Uh huh…yeah…sorry, I didn't hear you, one second Amy. Charmy! Stop raking on me or I swear to god I will come and summon my wrath upon you, cease that racket before I send you to the looney bin! Ehem… sorry Amy, so you were saying?"

Charmy was flying about in the kitchen of the Chaotix headquarters, banging on some pots and pans with a wooden spoon and causing a clangoring riot in the house. Singing in a puerile manner "Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat, if you don't I don't care I'll just take your underwear!" and laughing out loud in a rambunctious tone.

"Ughhh, how you tolerate him is beyond my understanding, and that's coming from me! Someone who's good with kids. Anyways, I was talking about the sugar Vector, two and a quarter cups of sugar."

"Sugar? Damn, there's one high on it here right now! I swear I could stuff him in the mixing bowl."

"Vector, are you gonna write down what I'm saying or not? Kinda in a hurry here, I haven't showered yet and I need to make some tiny adjustments to the house before everyone comes in for the party!"

"Oh, sorry, right, yeah let me jot that down…godammit! My freakin pen ran out of ink!" It was a promo pen of the Chaotix detective agency with a number and a shibboleth that read **"Sherlocks got nothing on us!"**

"Charmy! Make yourself useful and hound me a pen!"

"Yes sir!" With that said he performed his trademark air flip and zoomed into the main hall.

"So what are you going to wear for the Halloween party Vector?" Amy asked from the speaker.

"Well Miss Rose that's a surprise for now, you'll just have to wait and see. My costumes ready but before we head out to your place I gotta bring my special brownies and last time I checked yours were scrumptious! Since I like to bake once in a while I want to make my own variety based on your ingredient."

"Lookin' forward to that, if the Chaotix can't get one thing right at least they can bake a cake right?" Amy giggled

"Sherlocks got nothing on us Amy! I gotta send you a pen!"

**Charmy:**

After searching for a few minutes Charmy couldn't find a single damn pen. While rummaging about he would consider objects as animate beings, talking with them, asking them questions and yelling at them when he failed to find what he was searching for. "Hey, I know! Espio would know where I can find Mr. Pen!" in a burst of flight he headed backdoor but saw Espio meditating under the autumnal shade of the final day of October while crimson leaves danced aimlessly in the wind. The chameleon had a strict policy with his meditation routine, under no condition were you allowed to bother him. After being berated by Espio several times in the past Charmy knew that it wasn't a good idea to irritate him.

Ebbing and flowing aimlessly suddenly Charmy realized where to search but it was a place he dreaded, the storage room. Rotating the steel doorknob the wooden door creaked in an eerie fashion, it was as if the whole place was awaiting his presence. He turned the light bulb on by pulling the dangling metal switch and staring at the light.

He found a piece of folded paper on the ground, it seemed rather aged and ancient. Picking up the paper he unfolded it as the words of an eerie calligraphy read "Because you are good children, the monsters look forward to your make belief visit!" GULP!

"Silly me, look at this place, nothings scary about it!" Mustering all the courage inside him he floated up the downstairs, somehow that paradoxical sentence doesn't make any sense! But that's how it felt to him, somehow the staircase was haunted by an ominous presence. He went and went but an ending was never in sight.

He smacked his helmet a few times so he could get his head straight, finally reached the bottom it somewhat felt like he had been standing in the same spot for the past 5 minutes, it was all a delusion.

"Keep your head straight Charmy! You have dealt with spookier cases!" Moving among the large boxes and cakes of collected dust and ghost turds he spotted the small white boxes where the promo pens were. Suddenly Vector blurted from above, thumping down the stairs with ferocity.

"Charmy! I swear you can't do one simple task right! What took you so long! I'll just take the pens myself!" With brawn the bluff crocodile pushed some boxes aside and dropped a few in his path, his flushed angry face indicated a choleric nature as he eyed Charmy and picked up the pack of pens and headed back up yelling "Get back up!" while grumbling at the same time. Silence filled the room once again, suddenly something caught Charmy's eye, one of the boxes that had tilted and fallen to the ground was left in a semi open state and something was inside. On the sides it was written "Do not touch! Ever!" with a big thick red marker. But warning were welcomes for the bee so following his curious instinct he examined the innards of the box.

"What are these? Herbs?"

The bag scrunched as he flipped it over to the other side and ogled at it again. "Hmm, funny green color! Wait! I know what this is! This is from Espio's herb and tea collection, he's really into these natural remedies and sometimes uses them in his cooking!"

He opened the bag and a powerful and pungent smell fumed in his face "Whoa! That's strong! Let me show this to Vector, we can add it to the brownies and make a tasty cookie! Everybody will be pleased and for once no one would be angry at Charmy!" Unbeknownst to him, it was a bag of cannabis used for "therapeutic" reasons as claimed by Espio.

He grabbed the bag and headed up the downstairs but nothing seemed to happen, in fact he didn't feel scared at all. He was hyped! Busting out of the storage room he headed into the hall waving the bag of cannabis in the air yelling "Hey guys! Look what I found!" No one was there though, Espio was still outside meditating and Vector? Possibly upstairs looking for some peace and quiet since his voice could be heard talking with Amy.

He headed to the kitchen, the ambient noise of the mixer had filled the room as it was mixing the ingredients altogether. "And now for the secret ingredient" Charmy's eyes dilated in excitement as he emptied the Mary Jane into the cookie mix, something beyond LD50, it was as if a storm was brewing in that mixing bowl, legions of hypothetical atomic bombs portending the highness to come.

**At Sonic's:**

If Sonic was known as the world's fastest living creature on the other side of the spectrum he was the world's slowest planner. With a few more hours left on the clock toward the start of the Halloween party he still hadn't ordered a costume and was living life as if it was just another normal day. Searching fiercely through the teeming do-it-yourself's on how to make your own fake blood and guts no remedy was in sight for a quick costume fix. While opening another page on the internet he spotted an advertisement of picking axe's and chainsaws. Precipitously he blurted:

"Wood…WOOD! Wood means lumberjack, lumberjack means the hardworking folk of our society!"

He bolted toward his dresser which was empty all the time thanks to the concealing effects of biological reactions. The damn hedgehog didn't need clothes. Nothing in sight, just dangling cloth hangers sporting the emperor's invisible garments.

"What the hell was I thinking back then when I got this useless piece of junk built?"

Heading back to his desk in a sullen state he saw a flyer on his desk he had brought in a few days ago "Bojangles Used Clothing Wholesale! No fleas in business, so clean you can lick em!"

"Bojangles! Comin' your way to give a lick!" He quickly figured out the address and busted through the window onto the street to find this newly opened wholesale.

Not back as a lumberjack, Sonic had arrived back home with a big nylon bag full of his new chosen attire for the evening. Jumping into his new clothing he stood in front of the mirror while chortling, old oversized overalls that needed to be washed plus a baseball cap with a big logo of a beer company and old work boots that seemed to have been fished out from the bottom of a pond. Taking a few awkward poses in front of the mirror he cleared his throat and changed to a southern accent and dropped a few lines of hillbilly wisdom. With a hand on his hip and a finger pointing forward in a preaching manner he bespoke.

"If eveerythins comin' yur way, yurin the wrong lane!"

Changing his body language with utter travesty he said:

"I'm bowed up like a Halloween Cat"

Impersonating the effects of cold weather and shaking like an icicle he turned into a ball and said:

"It's colder than a pair of witch tits in a brass bra!"

Sitting on his computer chair like a sage he said:

"If his brains were dynamite, he couldn' blow his nose!"

Satisfied with his appearance and verbal skill one more thing was missing in the scheme of things, a gun! A gun to represent his hillbilly pride.

"Hahaha, all I need is a gun! Gonna get me gun! And I know the right lad to call!"

Picking up the phone near his computer desk he dialed Shadow.

"Yeah" A smoky sound spoke from the other side of the speaker

"Shad's you got a gun? A mean shotgun!"

"Well that's a surprise, Sonic the Hedgehog asking for a gun, what you need it for?"

"Well for tonight's party, I'm not giving away clues or anything"

"You want to slaughter everybody?"

"Yes, starting with you!"

"I am the ultimate life form"

"Life form, shmuck form, Shad's your about as useful as a pogostick in quicksand!" Sonic spoke in his southern accent.

"You're a hillbilly? Now I know why you need that gun. Thing is I can't bring the gun for you and you can't carry a firearm in the open around here, it's against the law. So I'll just bring it with myself and hand it to you there."

"Good, I'm surprised how we reached an agreement without grousing around"

"You want it cocked and loaded?"

"Damn Shadow, it's a party not a killing spree!"

"Well, just tryin' to make you more authentic. I always knew you had that hillbilly pride"

Sonic switched to his southern accent "I have three speeds: on, off, and don't push your luck."

"Really scared, I'll bring the gun with me and hand it to you at six"

"Thanks Shad's. That Shad's I tell ya is sharper than a cue ball!"

**Moments before the party:**

With only an hour left on the clock to kickoff the party Amy was preparing herself to wear her costume. Inside the house was full of Halloween themed symbols and sign, her front door had an invitation from the angel of death reading "Enter if you dare!" plus several plump and orange pumpkins laid scattered around her front lawn with a humorous display of a wasted witch crashed into a tree. Sticky cobwebs laid dangling by the front porch as they swayed idly in the velvet darkness beginning to foreshadow the sky. The wooden rails were decorated with carved out pumpkins that had facial expressions of silly to sinister. Each of them had a faint light glowing out from them giving a spooky vibe to the house. The lawn was filled with crooked and broken epitaphs, a sepulchral landscape of the dead.

All sorts of candy, chocolates, chips, pretzels, beer and alcohol laid ready on the serving table. A big wide dance floor was in the middle, blotches of dancing lights and lasers were spinning and moving randomly. It was empty but in an hour or so it was going to be a dance station.

Donning her circular shades, she looked at herself in the mirror taking a pose or two, a hand on the hip or a crooked stance. Inspired by her current trend of listening to 60's psychedelic rock music she was clad in a jean miniskirt and a bra style tie-dye top. Amy had decided to be a hippie girl.

"There's one more thing to add"

She reached for her metal container and picked up a large metallic peace sign with a chain and hung it around her neck then preening her suave hairstyle, short like always with bangs that gave her that 60's appeal.

It was six o'clock and the menacing sound of a sports car rumbled in front of the garage. Suddenly the doorbell rang "Oh! The guests are here" Amy gasped, "better head downstairs" she walked swiftly as her necklace, earrings and bracelets jangled out loud "Coming!" she yelled. She looked through the peephole.

"Oh I wonder who it is! Whoa! Two ex-boyfriends!"

She opened the door and it was none other than Sonic and Shadow, arriving together, a very rare scene to encounter.

"Well, don't you look prettier than a glob of butter melting on a stack of wheat cakes!" Sonic spoke in his lovely southern accent. Amy blushed and her breath turned shallow.

"Spare my blushes Sonic!" Sonic reached in for a hug, suddenly Amy's eyes caught a big shotgun in Sonic's hand "Whoa! whoa! Mister Is that a shotgun you're holding?"

"Thought I'd be a bit more authentic, don't worry, it's empty Ames!" he said as he cocked the shotgun to give a frightening stance.

"Slaughter time!"

"Believe me Sonic you're totally authentic with that accent of yours, not even a minute has passed and you're totally freaking me out!"

"Well it is Halloween isn't it?" Sonic said as he gave a harmless nookie on Amy's head and walked inside.

"Hey! I spent lots of time in the mirror tryin' to fix my hair you numbskull!" She complained in annoyance as she rubbed her head.

Sonic walked inside and whistled in charm and started to examine the place.

Shadow stood there silently with his trademark "no shit given" stance, Amy was purposely silent waiting for a hello or greeting, eyeing him from head to toe, just what the hell was he?

A terse "Hi" was what Shadow said. "Uhmm… hi? Shadow, mind telling me what you're dressed up as?" Amy asked in a dumbfounded yet pondering tone.

"The ultimate life form, I'm Shadow the Hedgehog." Shadow rebutted nonchalantly. Amy's jaws dropped wide open in astonishment. "Really? I thought I'm seeing Shadow the unicorn or something! You know if you just tore the draperies off your window and just covered yourself in them you would've done a better job!"

"I'm not into such petty, childish acts"

Sonic yelled from inside the house, addressing his redneck wisdom "Excuses are like backsides. Everybody's got one and they all stink."

"Get in Shad's before I butcher you for not following the dress code"

**In the midst of the party (madness strikes):**

The resonance of the muffled bass frequencies could be heard in the bathroom, Knuckles the 80's glam metal frontman was taking a quick whiz. He had consumed too much of that blood colored fruit punch that had fake fingers and toes in them and was rather loose and inebriated by alcohol consumption. All the drinking of alcohol and the results of excessive jumping up and down had to be collected somewhere and that somewhere was in his bladder, currently busy with pouring a yellow stream of piss into the loo.

He zipped up his tight jeans and stuffed a ball of socks back into his crouch to give off that androgenic vibe of manliness, adjusting his shiny leather vest he headed back out. Opening the door back into the hallway the music came to life, picking up his beer from the mini table he witnessed the festivity and craziness of the hour, everyone was busier than a stump of ants. The panorama was abound with loads of paper cups; too late to know which one's which, everybody just grabbed a new one or picked up someone's used cup and chugged like an animal. Flashing lights, black, orange and white confetti all over the place.

Everyone was in the middle, Vector was dressed up as a Rastafarian and was the DJ of the hour dropping a special Halloween mix. He had also brought a little gift to the party, brownies which he insisted that should be eaten later. There was Charmy in his utmost hyper mood dressed up in formal attire as a 90's stock broker with a dangling phone cord in his hand. Tails was a kamikaze pilot who had put on his goggles and was dancing with Cream who was a mortician and had walked in with a shovel and dirty muddy attire as if she had just dug a grave and had a freaky visual appearance with bags under her eyes. Knuckles' love interest, Rouge who was dressed up as a femme fatal sexy nurse, she came with a first aid kit and a huge syringe in her hand that freaked out everybody and had Amy yammering on about why everyone came with their tool of their trades, shotguns, shovels, microphones, dangling phones, scepters and a syringe. She claimed that she should've walked in with a blunt, little did she know that everyone was about to get stoned. Silver was dressed up as a wizard and had put on a long gray fake beard which matched his gray skin and was currently moonwalking on the slick dance floor and hovered a few shots of vodka in a circular motion in the air while everybody cheered him on. Shadow was sitting on the counter with Sonic as Sonic filled his cup with some beer saying "Here sonny, drink some of this mint julep!"

The music halted, picking up the microphone vector yelled "OK party animals, break time! DJ needs to refresh himself, take in some water and empty some water to come back again for more non-stop boogie fever!"

Amy signaled at Vector to try out the brownies, he smacked his head realizing how forgetful he was.

"Party people, I'd really like it if you guys try my special brownies I made! Amy helped me so much, it's a new recipe so check it out!"

Everybody was exhausted and seriously needed to settle down a bit and dropped on the couch.

"Hey! I just came back!" Knuckles said in a pouting tone while kneeling on the big table full of junk food and tasty treats and sweets.

"Crotch man! It's time for a break, try out Vectors brownies" Amy said while bringing the brownies and putting them on the table. Charmy's eyes dilated, he was eager to see how everyone would react. Everyone attacked the brownies, they needed sugar in their blood and the calmness of this break gave them much solace. After placing the brownies on the table Amy was the first to take a bite.

Everyone watched her as she took a bite, being the iron chef she was she savored the flavor, concentrated on the texture and played with the ball of desert in her mouth before swallowing the bolus.

"Wow! This is really good Vector, my god, there's something in this I swear. There's an extra recipe, I don't know what it is but this tastes really different from what I make! It's good!"

Before could Vector think of what he had added that tasted so different everybody took a grab from the plate, gobbling and bolting on the treat, crumbs of the scrumptious brownies fell on the ground as everyone chewed with passion.

"Mmmmm, my god Vector I never knew you were a pastry chef, these are some delectable brownies!" Tails said as he gobbled on the brownies.

"Oh yeah Vec, these are darn' tootin good!" Sonic chimed in. Everybody was in agreement and talking about how good they taste and were patting Vector on the back.

Silver climbed on the table and raised his beer glass **"TO VECTOR! FOR THE BEST DANCE MIX AND BROWNIES! CHEERS TO THE BLOKE! HAPPY HALLOWEEN FRIENDS!"** everybody joined in and grabbed a cup and cheered for the health of their reptilian pal. He chugged on the beer and took a bite from the lethal brownies. A crazy mixture, hash and alcohol in the works.

Vector was blushing "Thanks everyone, it was nothing really. I couldn't have done it with Amy's recipe, she was a great help!"

It didn't take too long when everyone started to feel a little light in the head, shallow hallucinations. The true secret recipe was starting to kick in and nobody knew what the hell was going on in their heads. Everything was chilled and relaxed, Vector went behind the deck and turned the music on but this was done with an increased mental effort. Somehow all the knobs just seem to pop up like a popup book, the equalizers all just seemed to change color for themselves and move up and down in a beautifully conducted manner. The music started to blast, the vinyl started to spin but in his eyes it felt as if they were wheels of a car.

"Whoa, am I the only person here but I somewhat feel phased out or something! Holy crap, I see the sounds! Purple, green, yellow waves, holy mother of Christ, somehow the music feels really good right now, I feel at one with the beat!"

His head hung down low, nobody seemed to respond all too well but it was obvious that everyone felt dazed.

"Happy pills! These brownies feel like my good ol' happy pills" Espio the Zen Monk claimed as he started to impersonate a bird, flapping his imaginary wings up and down among the rather empty dance floor. It was probably the only time he got onto the dance floor since the beginning of the party and was making a complete idiot of himself.

Sonic was starting to talk gibberish and his head was resting on Amy's thighs who was also flat on the ground like a dead bug. "Mabel! I feel high as giraffe nuts!" he grabbed on to her thighs and started biting at them "Somewhat this looks like a drumstick! Yum!"

"Ouch! Haha…hahahahahaha…HAHAHAHAHAHA!" Amy started to laugh out like a maniac, she watched Espio as he danced around. He turned back at her and laughed like a madman in return while picking up a carved pumpkin and shoving it in his head which resulted in his horn sticking into the flesh of the pumpkin and bulging out; it looked tremendously stupid as he walked around aimlessly coliding with everything. All of this made Amy burst out in laughter so hard that she felt her kidneys was about to explode, Sonic was still sticking on to her like a leech but this time tried to bite her tummy.

"KAMIKAZE!" Tails flew off and bashed himself into the window pane, breaking all the glass and landing into the grassy lawn like a dead target. He then got off like nothing happened and started to spin in circles in the front lawn.

Cream, being in her preteens started not to give a fuck about the law and declared anarchy as she took a swig from all the semi full cups scattered all over the party scene. She got vexed when she found an empty cup and would crush it and cuss out loud and every time she found a full cup she would hold it in the air and toast everyone in an awkward Irish accent.

"Here's to cheating, stealing, fighting, and drinking. If you cheat, may you cheat death. If you steal, may you steal a woman's heart. If you fight, may you fight for a brother. And if you drink, may you drink with me!"

And with that she would drink like a 30 year drunkard and wipe her mouth with her elbow and toss the cup aside while burping out loud.

Shadow began to roll himself in the draperies and really began to hate himself for not wearing any Halloween clothes. He looked at the busted glass window, they were starting to change their places, the doors were where the windows should be and the windows were where the doors should be. Freaking out he picked up Sonic's Shotgun and joined Tails in the lawn who was still spinning around aimlessly like a maniac and started to gut all the pumpkins in the lawn with the butt of the shotgun yelling "I AM THE ULTIMATE LIFE FORM!" and orchestrating more carnage.

Knuckles was once again in the bathroom but this time he had walked out with the toilet seat hung around his neck. Losing all balance he collided with the back of the couch and flipped over and landed on the couch and then on to the floor to end with a loud note while pissing like a loose hose on full pressure.

Two of our lovely party members were extremely fried, crispy-critters Rouge and Silver were making out with each other (I give you the strangest pairing!). Silver's hairy chest came to Rouge as pink cotton candy as she licked and moistened it then tried take a bite out of the gross chest hairs. Silver's telekinesis abilities had gone haywire and believed that he needed to be treated by the sultry nurse and kept calling himself a "bad, bad boy" he accidentally unlatched her bra from behind.

But among the cataclysm someone was in a rather perfect mood at least relatively because he still was a pain in the ass when everyone was functioning normally, it was Charmy the stockbroker. He had watched all this chaos with awe-inducing amusement. Flinching, laughing and shuddering. It was he who hadn't taken a bite of the brownie and his share was still left on the plate, eyeing the brownies he realized that if he had taken a bite from that thing he would've gone madder than all the crazy stuff conducted by all the other guests' altogether, a lunatic heavyweight on his own. He looked at the dangling phone cord in his hand, maybe it was time to call the police? To help his friends, and thus we witness another stupidity conducted by the Bee.

Here Sonic pops op from TrollingnoodXDew's story to give us a very important message "Remember kids, don't snitch on your friends to the cops when they do drugs"

Minutes later the blue suits and J. Edgar Hoovers arrived on the scene and had handcuffed everyone and sent them to the pokey. Nobody knew what the fuck was going on, they thought that the nice taxi man had arrived and was taking them to their homes.

"I knew they were blue, Taxis were blue the whole time you turds! BAHAHA!" Cream roared while turning completely silent thereafter.

**Flotsam Prison Blues:**

Home sweet home? It was more like a family reunion held in a big prison cell with all the other misfits of today.

"Hey crunchie! Open the door cell will ya?" Amy asked while stooping from the big metallic bars. The guard didn't answer and she walked back.

"Well this just dills my pickle" Sonic croaked while pulling his cap down and concealing his face while leaning on Amy and grabbing a boob. Amy didn't seem to mind, nobody's awareness was in play anyway.

Tails and Silver were talking about nonsense "…he got kicked in right the crystals, poor bloke"

The clowns huddled together in a moment of silence, they fully knew they were in prison but just couldn't consider it as serious. Charmy watching his friends felt a sense of guilt wash over him, he had screwed up the evening.

"Guy's…I forgot to tell something to you…" Charmy said

"I think I added something to the brownies"

"WHAT!" Everyone yelled in unison!

"GO ON!" Espio yelled

"In the storage room today where I went to find the pens, Vector you smashed a few boxes in your way and from one of the boxes I saw some herbs and stuff! So I checked them out and they smelled really good! I realized they were Espio's cooking herbs so I decided to add them to make the mix really tasty! I added some green stuff into the brownie mix… I wanted to help! They smelled good!"

"HORSEFEATHERS! You added WEED to the mix?!" Espio yelled!

Everybody gasped!

Espio screamed in fury, everyone was pissed now and they wanted to pulverize the bee. Charmy, sweating bullets began to flap his wings and distance himself from the angry mob of his friends and stick to the ceiling of the cell while everybody tried to jump and catch him by the legs. All forms of scolding and epithets could be heard being flung at the bee. Suddenly everyone was beating each other up and causing a racket!

The scene ended with a Happy Halloween Banner hung in the prison! The End!

**Hope you guys enjoyed this installment! Most of the redneck dialogues were taken from the redneck wisdom website, also the Irish quote by Cream is a famous Irish saying.**


End file.
